Ex-homosexual overcame, helping others

Darrel Auvenshine has struggled with same-sex attraction for most of his adult life. Involved in the ministry Living Hope, which reaches out to those who struggle with unwanted same-sex attraction, Auvenshine has been able to his overcome same-sex attraction through the grace of God, he says.

Now a staff member at a Southern Baptist church in Texas, Auvenshine tells his story of God’s deliverance as often as he can.

“I became a Christian when I was 8” and was raised in a Christian home in Arlington and went to church most of his life, he said. “It wasn’t until I was 12 that I started identifying an attraction to the same sex. I started acting out on that around the age of 13.

Auvenshine was sexually active from age 13 to 23, he said.

“At the same time I was very active in my church and youth group. I felt the call to go into ministry. But at the same time I was living this double life that no one knew about.”

When Auvenshine was 19 he enrolled at Dallas Baptist University. He was still on the ministry path and was being mentored by his worship pastor.

“He gave me a cassette tape of Dennis Jernigan’s first worship album, ‘Break my Heart.'” At the beginning of that album Jernigan shares briefly how God rescued him from a homosexual lifestyle.

“That was the first time I realized that I could tell someone about my struggle,” Auvenshine said. “I realized that God still had a plan for my life. There was still the possibility of great things happening in my life. So I opened up about my struggle to the pastor who was mentoring me.”

About the same time Auvenshine’s parents confronted him about the issue.

“I had come home from DBU and my dad said that he wanted to talk to me. He said, ‘I know you are gay. I’ve known for a couple of years. I kept hoping you would come and talk to me, but I am afraid you never will. So I want to tell you I don’t know how to help you. I don’t know all the answers, but no matter what, we love you and it won’t change who you are to us. But we believe that God has a better plan for your life.'”

This show of compassion and unconditional love helped Auvenshine come to a place that God broke his heart.

“I knew that I could walk away from God and my parents would still love me. They exemplified the Father’s love.”

Having grown up in the church, Auvenshine knew how to attend church meetings and look involved, but he had never pursued God.

“My mother really encouraged me to pursue God’s heart,” Auvenshine said. “But I didn’t know how to live a holy life.”

His worship pastor discovered Living Hope Ministries, the North Texas referral ministry of Exodus International. “Living Hope was meeting in a church that was less than a mile from my parent’s house. It was to me miraculous that I could get in my car and in less than 10 minutes be at this ministry.”

Auvenshine went to the first meeting and “I felt like I wasn’t alone.” Auvenshine’s friends from the homosexual community had always told him that he could be a Christian and still be a homosexual.
But at Living Hope, Auvenshine learned that God had a better plan for his life.

“It was the beginning of coming away from homosexuality for me,” Auvenshine said. “The discipleship that I received there gave me hope that God could do it”

Auvenshine has been involved with Living Hope Ministries since 1993 when he attended his first meeting. He now helps lead small groups and musical worship and serves on the board of directors of Living Hope Ministries.

“My home church after a time of restoration embraced me. Many of the men shared their struggles with me and encouraged me.”

In 2001, Auvenshine was ordained into the ministry. He first served on staff at his home church. Auvenshine now serves as the worship and missions pastor at Alsbury Baptist Church in Burleson.

“There are times, as Christians, we claim we have been set free from our temptations. But while I have been delivered, it is still something I struggle with,” Auvenshine said. “A lot a people want to know, ‘is change possible? ‘Can people change?’ I say, ‘Absolutely, the gospel of Jesus Christ changes people every day. The gospel of Christ is powerful.'”

“The life that I lived was leading me to death, but God protected me,” Auvenshine said.

He strongly encourages churches to reach out to those who struggle with homosexual attraction.

“This is something that the church is dealing with every day,” Auvenshine said. “The church is adopting a soft approach on homosexuality. The church needs to teach correctly on this now, because the people in churches are already learning about homosexuality, but they are learning what the world says.”

One of the first things a church should do to reach out to people struggling with homosexuality is to become educated.

“Churches need to know both what the world teaches about gay theology and what God teaches about homosexuality,” Auvenshine said. “You can’t teach the truth unless you know what falsehoods you have to correct.”

“More importantly, we need to apply the grace message. What does it look like to overcome struggles. Find the people in your church who are open in their struggles and ask them to help with this ministry,” Auvenshine said. “They don’t have to have struggled with homosexual attraction, but find those people who understand the forgiveness and deliverance of God?those will be the most successful in this ministry.”

Auvenshine stressed that a church hoping to reach out to homosexuals needs to establish is a strong sense of community.

“There is a close gay community and to leave that community is like death,” Auventshine said. “People coming out of that community need another community to become a part of.”

Auvenshine also encourages churches to contact Living Hope Ministries.

In counseling some of the men in his small group, Auvenshine said God is preparing them to be bold about their life stories.

“I feel as if God is preparing them to tell the world, ‘Change really is possible.’ God is calling for greater transparency to show his power to the world.”

For more information on Living Hope Ministries, visit livehope.org. To contact Bob Stith, the Southern Baptist Convention’s national strategist for gender issues, visit sbcthewayout.com or call 817-424-9121.